UX Mentor Diaries

UX Mentor Diaries

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UX Mentor Diaries
UX Mentor Diaries
🤫 The Silent Career Killer #38
🔐 Secrets to Career Success

🤫 The Silent Career Killer #38

The Praise Trap (or what to do when your manager keeps complimenting you, but never sponsors your growth) | Unmasking 50 hidden threats to your UX career | part 38 of 50

Marina Krutchinsky's avatar
Marina Krutchinsky
Jul 02, 2025
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UX Mentor Diaries
UX Mentor Diaries
🤫 The Silent Career Killer #38
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Let’s start with the real scenario:

You’re consistently told:

  • “You’re doing great.”

  • “We rely on you so much.”

  • “I couldn’t do this without you.”

You might even hear:

  • “You’re one of the strongest on the team.”

  • “You have leadership potential.”

But then…

You’re passed over for the juicy project.

Someone newer gets the promotion.

You're looped in after decisions are made.

And your role… stays the same.

Month after month. Year after year.

This is what I call → The Praise Trap.

And it’s one of the most invisible, professionally dangerous dynamics in UX.

Because it flatters you just enough to keep you in place, without actually growing you.


🧠 Why This Happens (Even With “Good” Managers)

Most managers aren’t trying to sabotage you.

They’re overwhelmed.

Under pressure.

Incentivized to reduce chaos.

And you?

You’re the one who doesn’t need hand-holding.

Who keeps everything running.

Who steps in when things fall through the cracks.

You’ve become their “safe pair of hands.”

And the longer that identity sticks, the harder it is for them to imagine you in a stretch role because you’re already holding up the current one.

They’re not malicious.

They’re just risk-averse.

And giving you more would mean losing the person they trust most to keep things stable.


Praise ≠ Sponsorship

Here’s the distinction that changes careers:

If all you’re getting is praise and none of the sponsorship behaviors above?

You’re not on a growth path.
You’re in a holding pattern.


🚨 How to Break the Pattern

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