5 Reasons You Still Don’t Feel Like a UX Leader
And how to fix each one (without waiting for permission or a promotion)
👋 Happy Saturday, my dear UX friends, Marina here!
This came from a recent session with a mentee ↴
“I’ve been in UX for 9 years. I’ve led projects, mentored juniors, presented to execs... and yet I still hesitate to “speak like a leader”. Deep down, I don’t feel like one. How do I change that?”
I hear this all the time from experienced UXers.
They’ve done lead-level work.
They’ve earned influence.
But they still feel stuck in a supporting role, like they’re “not quite there.”
Here’s what’s really going on ↴
1. You’ve been working at a high level, but calling it something small.
You may commonly say things like:
“I helped to redesign the dashboard.”
“I sat in on leadership meetings to represent design.”
“I provided feedback to junior designers on the team.”
The problem: You’re describing strategic-level work… in junior-level language.
And that framing shapes how others see you, and how you see yourself.
🛠 Fix:
Start rewriting your own narrative.
Try these instead:
“I led a dashboard redesign focused on surfacing insights that reduced advisor decision friction.”
“I translated user priorities into roadmap shifts during our leadership reset.”
“I became the continuity point between product heads in a volatile reorg.”
✅ Why this matters:
The language you use teaches people how to perceive you.
When you describe lead-level impact using vague or tactical phrases, you reinforce the idea that you're "just" an executor.
But when you name your outcomes clearly - strategic decisions, cross-functional influence, measurable change - you reposition yourself as someone who leads.
Not someday. Now.
2. You haven’t defined the kind of leader you are.
Leadership isn’t one-size-fits-all.
The problem: So if you’re chasing a vague image of what “leaders” look like, you’ll never feel like you match it.
🛠 Fix:
Identify your actual leadership lane.
Are you:
A systems thinker who prevents problems before they scale?
A strategic partner who connects design decisions to business outcomes?
A team culture builder who grows others and sets the tone?
Own the version that reflects your strengths, so you stop measuring yourself against someone else’s style.
✅ Why this matters:
If you’re chasing someone else’s version of leadership, you’ll always feel like you fall short.
But when you define your own lane (based on how you actually operate) you stop trying to “fit” a mold and start showing up with clarity.
Leaders aren’t carbon copies.
They’re consistent in how they drive impact.
Define it, so you can lead as yourself.
3. You’ve never been taught to claim your influence.
Many UXers wait to be seen as a leader.
But the truth it’s rarely granted. It’s usually claimed.
You already lead when you:
Make decisions in ambiguity
Connect work to impact
Influence without authority
Coach others intentionally
🛠 Fix:
Make a “leadership proof bank.”
Write down 5–10 times you influenced outcomes, shaped thinking, or created clarity when others couldn’t.
These are your receipts.
Stop ignoring them.
✅ Why this matters:
Most UXers I worked with still think influence is something you’re given - after the title, the promotion, the invite.
But the reality, you’ve already had influential moments! You just haven’t been taught to recognize or claim them.
Once you start collecting those moments as evidence, the story changes - from “I hope they notice me” to “Here’s what I bring.”
Leadership isn’t a label.
It’s a pattern you can learn to see.
4. You’re great at doing the work, but not positioning the work.
This is where experienced ICs plateau.
They keep doing high-level work, but describe it like “tasks.”
🛠 Fix:
Shift your self-talk, resume, and portfolio from execution to ownership.
Ask yourself:
What decision did I enable?
What risk did I reduce?
What team or product problem did I help solve at scale?
You’ll be shocked how much strategy you’ve buried under vague bullets.
✅ Why this matters:
Doing the work isn’t enough (you knew that, right?) - how you talk about it shapes whether others see you as a leader or a task-taker.
If you describe strategic impact like a checklist, you disappear behind your deliverables.
But when you frame your work in terms of decisions, risks, and outcomes - you signal ownership.
That’s what gets you taken seriously at the next level.
5. You’re still waiting for permission.
This one’s the hardest to unlearn.
If you were raised to believe that leadership is something bestowed - by a manager, a promotion, a reorg - you’ll stay stuck, even with 15 years under your belt.
🛠 Fix:
Lead anyway.
Speak up in ways that shift thinking.
Write and share insights that reflect your experience.
Say, “Here’s what I recommend” instead of “I think maybe we should…”
You don’t need permission to lead.
You need practice showing up like someone whose perspective carries weight. (Because it does.)
✅ Why this matters:
If you’re waiting for a title to make you a leader, you’ll keep playing small -even when you’re the most experienced person in the room.
Most likely, leadership won’t be handed to you.
It’s something you step into.
You already have the insight. The credibility. The experience.
Now it’s time to act like someone who belongs - because you do.
👉 Your Action Step:
Start small, but start today!
Write one post this week that reflects your leadership lens.
Don’t wait until you “have the title.”
Start acting like the leader you already are.
Try this:
“I used to think leadership meant having direct reports.
Now I define it as shaping outcomes, solving hard problems, and helping others grow - regardless of my title.”
If that sounds like your reality, you’re more ready than you think.
Start naming it.
Storytime ↴
One of my mentees did exactly this…
A few months ago, a UXer I coach - let’s call her R. - came to me with 10+ years of experience.
She’d led major initiatives, influenced org-level decisions, and mentored half her team...
Yet she still described herself as someone who “supports design execution.” (yes, for real!)
We reframed her experience.
We rewrote how she talked about her work, everywhere - in her resume, in interviews, and in meetings.
We practiced owning outcomes, not just activities.
Within 6 weeks:
She landed 2 interviews for roles she thought were “a stretch”
She got referred by VP-level connections impressed by her thought leadership post on Linkedin
And she started walking into conversations like the strategic leader she already was
She didn’t change who she was.
She just stopped hiding it.
👋 If you need help doing the same, join UX Career Boost.
You'll get access to:
✅ A private coaching session with me
✅ The full archive of strategy-packed issues
✅ Exclusive tools to help you lead with clarity and confidence
Let’s reposition your existing experience, and help the right people see you clearly.
You're not stuck.
You're just underclaimed.
Let’s change that.
See you next Saturday!
-Marina Krutchinsky,
A few more ways I can help you ↴
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